The image I have of him is in this exact outfit and this exact age. His little chubby hands holding onto this mug probably filled with juice cause he was allergic to milk products when he was little. His chipmunk cheeks, bright eyes and the smile that could light up a room. I remember this like it was yesterday. Seriously.
I found this mug, and that is the exact memory I had. I touched the mug like it was fine china and just about cried. My breath was taken away by this moment, like he was 2 years old again..all grins and all mischief!
It was at this time that I bough "The Little Mermaid" on VHS tape. I bought it for Nick, but found out that Tracy was just as excited about it.. maybe even more. That is when I realized that my husband was really just a big kid at heart and loved his cartoons. "The Little Mermaid" became Nick's favorite movie. Quickly followed by "The Jungle Book". He new how to work the VHS player and he rewound and pushed play over and over and over again. Yes, we let the VHS player babysit Nick so we could sleep in. *laugh* Of course, that didn't stop Nick from putting money into the VHS player thinking it was a bank. Once he even tried to put a sandwich in there!
This was about the age, we decided to have another kid. It's no secret, we were hoping for a little girl. Nick really wanted a baby sister. When he found out Nate was born, he was at the daycare center when he was told he had a brother, and he cried. He wanted a baby sister, but my mom took him out shopping for a toy for his new baby brother. And He bought Nate this cool yellow dinosaur with orange dots.
It was pretty much love at first sight at that point. And just as we were moving, Nate made sure to pack his Dinosaur and take his dino with him to the new house. He still loves that thing.
Of course, love at first sight, to a 3 year old, meant "I have a new play mate". Someone forgot to tell him that a newborn is not much of playmate and throwing your new born baby brother across the room while playing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was not a great idea. *laugh*
Of course, when we finally decided to have one last kiddo and we found out it was going to be a girl, both Nick and Nate were thrilled and they could not wait to meet her.
There are so many great moments between then and the day that he died that I remember... its those little wonders.. those small moments that are getting me by.
One very important one was the day that I took he and Suzy to tour Idaho State University. I didn't want them to go there. We had told Nick that we would help with tuition for college. We had a perfectly good university right there in Boise. But Nick insisted that he and Suzy wanted the typical "college experience" and they wanted to live away from home and in the dorms. He was told he would have to come up with the money for room and board. So, reluctantly, I drove them to the tour. It's a 3 hour drive one way from Boise. So we woke up and OMG its way too early in the morning and drove to Pocatello. Spent the day there and then had to drive home. Nick and Suzy crashed out in the back seat of the car. Dead asleep. And "Little Wonders" came on the radio, and I bawled my eyes out.
I may have been reluctant for him to go away to ISU, but I had the distinct pleasure of being the one that escorted these 2 amazing human beings to their college tour. I got to see their excitement. I got to be there in THAT moment, and its a moment I will never ever get to relive, but I was so grateful for THAT moment and for all the moments that lead up to that moment. And I promised myself, that I would never let "little wonders" pass me by for my children.
No matter how much I hated it, they were all getting older. They were all going to grow up and move out of the house one day, I and I needed to appreciate each moment I had with them. I got to share moments with my kids that most parents NEVER get to experience, and I am so grateful!
As we pack up the house that Nick spent 12 out of his 25 years in, I realize that many of these "Little Wonders" happened right here in this house and finding that mug today reminded me of that. And packing up his things NOW with Suzy reminds me of packing up his things when he left for college and when they left for Florida a year later. It's these moments......these little wonders.. these twists and turns of fate.......these are what make our lives. These are what made MY life...and I'm so grateful.
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